Recently, I overheard a couple arguing within an inch of their lives, the husband had packed a few bags, had removed his wedding ring and was moving out of their home.
…. Apparently, after a night of passionate love making, breakfast in bed and all the works, their sudden rekindled fire was abruptly extinguished in a moment of recklessness during the morning-after-pillow talk
The Cast:
- Husband (manly man)
- Wife (Shy, innocent, loving)
- Me (???)
(Husband) so, darling, I am glad I met you. it is so comforting to know that I can always count on you whenever and wherever you are probably the best thing that ever happened to me
(Wife, blushing) thank you, dear, you know you are the centre of my world and I am your ultimate fan and lover, here to support and satisfy you always
(Husband) I can imagine how difficult it was for you for those two years I was away in the UK for my MBA, you called me every evening and we talked for hours.. just as we are talking now
(Wife blushing) I know, those were trying times my love, I wished I could just wish myself into your arms and I would be there with you. I was kept going, by the way I felt for you, and the memories we had made together… becoming your wife made the wait all worth it.
----they kiss, and hug---
(Husband) by the way, Akin and his fiancée had a fight, apparently, she lied to him and he found out, something she apparently did before they got married; I think couples should always tell the truth no matter what
(Wife) Really, that’s sad, well, they say the truth sets you free.. thankfully we have stayed true to each other, and will continue to be that way. So, is there anything in your past that you didn’t tell me, that I should know about?
(Husband) Nothing serious, I once had a brief affair with Tolani, the slender girl in your office, it was one night of indiscretion, and I think I mentioned it to you back then (wife sighs heavily) you forgave me for that already (he thinks to himself… I mean that was the naughtiest 12 months with Tolani as my little secret – he remembers the secret encounters in the office elevator the day after he proposed to his wife, and a cold content chill runs down his spine)… and you?
(Wife) you know I keep nothing from you, and you are my best friend and confidant, (husband nods), I have only one secret that has burdened my heart. I guess saying it today would lift a weight off my chest.
(Husband) Hmm, we shouldn’t keep anything from each other, love can handle all things, besides (he thinks to himself- I married a virgin; I know I was her first, I remember our wedding night, besides, she is so introverted, so how bad could this be?)
(Wife) you remember Steven, my childhood friend, the one that used to lend me his mobile phone to call you and all of that, who I said lost his girlfriend two years ago in an accident? Well, there was this day he came over and was really sad because he got robbed while wandering aimlessly around thinking of her; you should have seen him that day (husband sight, impatiently) well, he eventually came over to mine, and mum cooked for him before going out. He was bleeding and so I had to treat his wounds before he slept off in my arms.
(Husband) Hmm, I have always known you were caring and supportive and would always bend over backward to help your friends, that’s one of the qualities that really got me hooked on you. I hope Steve recovered sha, but that isn’t at all bad.
(Wife cuts in) well, he was so vulnerable and didn’t want to be alone, one thing led to another, and I- I- I (whispering ever so softly now) slept with him
(Husband cuts in) as in, you guys just slept in the same bed right?!
(Wife sobbing uncontrollably now) I am so ashamed dear, so ashamed to sometimes admit to myself that it even happened. it rained that night and it was cold, and we were in bed asleep and I was missing you and wanting you so much, and somehow I got lost in the moment, he was wearing the same cologne I bought you, the one I told u ‘does it for me” (wife sobbing now), the whole room smelt like you and I woke up and realized that it wasn’t you I that I had made love to during the night; I have been unable to look him in the eye ever since and I cut off all correspondence with him.
(Wife still sobbing) I know it’s a lot to take in at the moment, but in the spirit of not keeping secrets within us, please forgive me.
Husband: silence
Wife: silence
Me: Runs into the street yelling "haaaaaaaaa!!!! ara adugbo e wa di weyrey mu o!!!" (in Yoruba)
-end-
1. Did she really need to reveal that much?
2. Should he forgive her in the spirit of full disclosure?
3. Where should we draw the line on ‘truth telling’ in relationships?
We have all been raised to believe in all sorts of clichés, and one such is what played out here; truth be told, in relationships, truth is truth in the context of what is being said, where it is being said and to whom it is being said.
Then again, why bother, right?
The babe deserves to be shot! It's easy though to blame her naivety on her inexperience as she was a virgin when she got married. But to even consider saying all these to her husband??? That is sucidal! I have a friend who does something similar. She had a boyfriend before the person she's seeing now. She still sees and sleeps with her ex once in a while and at least once, she told her current. I don't know the story very well and they are still 'together' but I doubt that they will end up in married to each other. I am now a firm believer in 'what you don't know will not hurt you. If a guy/girl wants to know your past, they are not deserving of your present. If there is major potential deal breaking 'stuff' in your past like parental abuse or other stuff, it might be good to lay those bare earlier on in the relationship but beyond that? I beg let him/her without sin cast the first stone jor! As per the wife, see wetin inexperience can cause???!!! Mumu babe!
ReplyDeleteWell...i must say there really isnt anythg wrong with telling ur partner everythg but ur timing is very important..if she wanted to be very honest with him, she shld have told him before they got married(even if the broke off)atleast she wld be guilt free....but u cant blame virginity on naiveity...u dnt ve to be all out there to know wats up...i feel for her sha!!
ReplyDeleteBut my view is, if u want to be with sm1 u have to tell them everythg that u know if the find out eventually it wnt be gud..i dnt like to explain n do all that,"its not what you think thg" so ild rather say it as it is or avoid having to do confessions....
Prevention they say is better than cure...
we human beings are too sensitive jo...whats d difference between telling today and telling tomorrow, the person on the other end would react the same way. i say what u don't know won't hurt you, but if its something that would affect you guys as a unit or maybe ur kids then please do tell
ReplyDeletehi femi,i believe there is a great difference between telling now and telling tomorrow.Now could have been befor they got married and became a unit.the lady had a lot of opportunities to level with her then bloke and allow him make a sound decision.either he chooses to go ahead with the relationship or not.
ReplyDeleteafter deciding not to then she goes ahead to do so after the they have tied the knot.that not being smart,thats being stupid.
@Anonymous, they were already married when she did it. She married a virgin and succumbed to temptation only after the wedding.
ReplyDeleteIn as much as I believe in telling the truth especially when it adversely affects the family, the effect of this 'truth' is obviously negative.