What is the price of TRUTH? (a penny for your thoughts…)

Act 1 Scene 1:

Enter three characters, Stella, James, and Susan. Stella and James are romantically involved, while Susan is best friends with them both, separately.

Stella: I still can’t believe you hurt me the way you did? Besides everything else, we are first and foremost, friends, and I expect that you would be true to me at all times and not be the one to make me cry, it really hurts when I think of how deeply you hurt me

James: Seriously, what have I done wrong dear, our friendship matters a lot to me as well, hence my putting myself in rather difficult situations sometimes, just to get you to hear and understand what is in fact, the truth. When we started the affair, I told you that I was not prepared for any emotional commitments, and you agreed to it... we even coined the term best friends with the best benefits... together

Stella: I know, that is not the issue here. You broke my heart and threw my emotions in my face, you led me on and then pulled the carpet off from under my feet! you lied to me.

James: Wow!  That’s deep... do you recall how you always threw fits and became moody each time we talked about us and you said u loved me and I didn’t reply? Do you recall how many times you cried when I reminded you that you meant the whole world to me, as a friend and more, but nothing emotional?  the conversations you had with Stella about us, and how I was making you cry by not opening up my heart to you?

Stella (cutting in) Yes I do.

James: Well, I chose to keep you happy by playing along with you and saying everything you wanted to hear , and each time, I pointed out that I just said them to prevent you from crying. 

Stella (hmmmmm)

James: Yes Stel, it hurt each time I had to lie about it, but that was the only way to peace and that was all you wanted to hear, to you, saying those things were the truth, and all that mattered... was I then supposed to watch you cry day in day out? Even when we stopped, you seemed to suddenly hate me... it seemed the only way to keep being friends, was to keep giving you what you wanted to hear, even at the risk of me lying to you.

Stella: But you shouldn’t have lied still, I always appreciate the truth and I can handle the truth when it doesn’t hurt and when it is not thrown in my face... sometimes, we want to be lied to because it gives us something to hope for and look forward to while we try to make you into what we hope for...

James (now totally exasperated): are you for real?!  I pushed and prodded until I had to lie to you for peace to reign; now you tell me you can handle the truth? I am guessing this is why men assume women speak from both sides of their mouths sometimes:

A week earlier, the following conversation Act 1 Scene 2 had taken place:

RESULT = the crying and wailing were averted, peace seemed to reign, James kept up the façade and everyone seemed happy

Yesterday, the following conversation Act 1, Scene 3 ensued:

 





RESULT = a sad painful end to the friendship

I am guessing the real question here is: who is really to blame for the present situation? Stella, James, or both?

A penny for your thoughts, please.

How much information about your past, should you reveal to your partner?

Recently, I overheard a couple arguing within an inch of their lives, the husband had packed a few bags, had removed his wedding ring and was moving out of their home.

 …. Apparently, after a night of passionate love making, breakfast in bed and all the works, their sudden rekindled fire was abruptly extinguished in a moment of recklessness during the morning-after-pillow talk

The Cast:

• Husband     (manly man)
• Wife            (Shy, innocent, loving)
• Me              (???)

(Husband) so, darling, I am glad I met you. it is so comforting to know that I can always count on you whenever and wherever you are probably the best thing that ever happened to me

(Wife, blushing) thank you, dear, you know you are the centre of my world and I am your ultimate fan and lover, here to support and satisfy you always

(Husband) I can imagine how difficult it was for you for those two years I was away in the UK for my MBA, you called me every evening and we talked for hours.. just as we are talking now

(Wife blushing) I know, those were trying times my love, I wished I could just wish myself into your arms and I would be there with you. I was kept going, by the way I felt for you, and the memories we had made together…  becoming your wife made the wait all worth it.

----they kiss, and hug---

(Husband) by the way, Akin and his fiancée had a fight, apparently, she lied to him and he found out, something she apparently did before they got married; I think couples should always tell the truth no matter what

(Wife) Really, that’s sad, well, they say the truth sets you free.. thankfully we have stayed true to each other, and will continue to be that way. So, is there anything in your past that you didn’t tell me, that I should know about?

(Husband) Nothing serious, I once had a brief affair with Tolani, the slender girl in your office, it was one night of indiscretion, and I think I mentioned it to you back then (wife sighs heavily) you forgave me for that already (he thinks to himself… I mean that was the naughtiest 12 months with Tolani as my little secret – he remembers the secret encounters in the office elevator the day after he proposed to his wife, and a cold content chill runs down his spine)… and you?

(Wife) you know I keep nothing from you, and you are my best friend and confidant, (husband nods), I have only one secret that has burdened my heart. I guess saying it today would lift a weight off my chest.

(Husband) Hmm, we shouldn’t keep anything from each other, love can handle all things, besides (he thinks to himself- I married a virgin; I know I was her first, I remember our  wedding night, besides, she is so introverted, so how bad could this be?)

(Wife) you remember Steven, my childhood friend, the one that used to lend me his mobile phone to call you and all of that, who I said lost his girlfriend two years ago in an accident? Well, there was this day he came over and was really sad because he got robbed while wandering aimlessly around thinking of her; you should have seen him that day (husband sight, impatiently) well, he eventually came over to mine, and mum cooked for him before going out. He was bleeding and so I had to treat his wounds before he slept off in my arms.

(Husband) Hmm, I have always known you were caring and supportive and would always bend over backward to help your friends, that’s one of the qualities that really got me hooked on you. I hope Steve recovered sha, but that isn’t at all bad.

(Wife cuts in) well, he was so vulnerable and didn’t want to be alone, one thing led to another, and I- I- I (whispering ever so softly now) slept with him 

(Husband cuts in) as in, you guys just slept in the same bed right?!

(Wife sobbing uncontrollably now) I am so ashamed dear, so ashamed to sometimes admit to myself that it even happened.  it rained that night and it was cold, and we were in bed asleep and I was missing you and wanting you so much, and somehow I got lost in the moment, he was wearing the same cologne I bought you, the one I told u ‘does it for me” (wife sobbing now),  the whole room smelt like you and I woke up and realized that it wasn’t you I that I had made love to during the night; I have been unable to look him in the eye ever since and I cut off all correspondence with him.

(Wife still sobbing) I know it’s a lot to take in at the moment, but in the spirit of not keeping secrets within us, please forgive me.

Husband: silence

Wife: silence

Me: Runs into the street yelling "haaaaaaaaa!!!! ara adugbo e wa di weyrey mu o!!!" (in Yoruba)

-end-

1.     Did she really need to reveal that much?

2.     Should he forgive her in the spirit of full disclosure?

3.     Where should we draw the line on ‘truth telling’ in relationships?

We have all been raised to believe in all sorts of clichés, and one such is what played out here; truth be told, in relationships, truth is truth in the context of what is being said, where it is being said and to whom it is being said.  

Then again, why bother, right?